There is no definitive line for the good or bad within a person to merge into one or the other, because within good, there is bad, and within bad, there is good.
Every day, I do things I can be really proud of, and some days I do things that, frankly, when I look back, I can feel ashamed of. Every person on the planet is the same; sometimes they are proud of themselves, and sometimes they are ashamed and embarrassed.
Today I’m going to share a couple of stories of a proud moment of mine from a couple of months ago, that made a big impact on a couple of people, and a story from today that I’m not so proud of, and discuss the rollercoaster of emotions and judgements we can have on this self-development journey.
A PERSON CANNOT BE ALL GOOD
We are not saints, we are sinners. We all make mistakes. And we are all capable of good, even the people we deem as bad.
I don’t think goodness matters if there is a god or not, or if a person believes in God.
Some people who believe in God are mostly good, some people who believe can behave disgustingly a large percentage of the time.
Some people who don’t believe in God are mostly good, some people who don’t believe can behave disgustingly a large percentage of the time.
So, irrespective of your beliefs, just try to be good.
I try to be good.
Not because I’m aiming for heaven, or any ideological good place.
But because when I do something bad, I feel bad, and so do other people.
And when I do something good, I feel good, and so do other people.
THE GOOD STUFF!
I was at the airport a few months ago. And in the ladies’ bathroom, I found a phone that someone had left behind.
I went on a little wild goose chase trying to find the phone’s owner, and failed.
I saw on the locked screen that her flight was almost 4 hours away, so despite walking towards her gate, I realised she wouldn’t be going there that early!
So I decided to speak to a few workers and eventually the phone was handed to the service desk – and do you realise how hard it can be to hand a phone that you don’t own to someone you don’t know for safekeeping?!
It was so much harder than I expected! My ego was like “what if this person can’t be trusted?!”… as if I was the only trustworthy person on the planet. Because that made a lot of sense in that moment hahaha
A short while after, I was loitering nearby the hallway that led to the toilet, ordering some food, just in case I could catch up with the lost phone’s owner and I saw a very stressed lady come out.
I said to her: “You look so stressed. Are you ok?”
And she all but burst into tears telling me she’d lost her phone, and it was only a 3 week old replacement.
I explained my end of the story, and pointed her to the service desk after receiving a huge hug from her and infinite gratitude!
Shortly after, as I sat in the food court eating a late lunch, she sat nearby, and pointed to her phone in her hand and gave me the thumbs up, and a huge smile, mouthing “thank you” over and over.
THE BAD STUFF – CRINGE
Now for today’s story.
I can’t believe that I’m actuallly going to share this story before I’ve even forgiven myself for it.
I was pottering online, doing a favour for someone I didn’t even know, as a part of the process of continuing to build my website – we have a beautiful “pay-it-forward” system within Wealthy Affiliate, where we are encouraged to help each other out giving genuine feedback on each others’ websites.
After putting some genuine thought into how I would help this person, I received a comment back saying that my help wasn’t appreciated because this person had thought that I’d genuinely not spent enough time and effort into giving good feedback.
I was triggered.
I thought to myself “how dare this person tell me that I hadn’t put any effort in, and how dare she not appreciate the energy I put into giving a comment that I genuinely thought would be appreciated”.
So I brought her website up again, and scrolled through clicking on pages until I found where her email address was hiding.
And I did it.
I sent that email like the self-righteous brat that my ego was acting out.
I STILL CAN’T BELIEVE I WAS “THAT” PERSON!
Of course that poor person would’ve been quite taken aback. And even though I didn’t abuse her, I’m absolutely certain she’d have felt that I was harrassing her.
She’d had a bad run where people hadn’t been giving her page genuine feedback, and evidently, my comment had gone through very soon after she had posted wanting feedback, and she had taken a negative view on my comment, possibly without even reading it; it was simply discarded like junk.
She obviously wrote back calling me a few negative things, including being spiteful and I think she also said I was nasty. A few emails were flicked to and from before I realised that this lady was just feeling completely harassed – despite that not having been my intention! All I’d wanted was for her to consider how much effort other people might have put in to helping her with feedback.
I think my guides must’ve kicked my backside at that moment of realisation, and I automatically felt awful.
I sent another email where I apologised profusely, affirming to her that I should never have emailed her about this, reiterating that I had tried to give her a comment which would be appreciated and that I was sorry she hadn’t thought it was useful.
As soon as I changed my tune, she wrote back and apologised also, showing regret that we had spent that time bickering rather than helping each other with our websites, and recognising that I did have good intent, despite my original approach which I still feel genuinely awful about.
KINDNESS IS ACTUALLY MAGICAL
Despite good intentions, we can all do bad things.
And for all the good things we can sometimes do, it’s not always with good intentions.
The good and bad live together in this world of dualities and polarities.
In the end, it genuinely doesn’t take much to try to be kind.
It doesn’t take much to try to be a good person.
It doesn’t take much to correct our ways when we do f*** up and realise what we’ve done.
And the joy, love and happiness we share with others in doing so, is worth every ounce of effort we put in.
Imagine if the entire world was able to live in that much gratitude and happiness toward each other all the time.
What a world this would be!
Love and Blessings,