“I Am” Affirmations – Understanding Toxic Thought Processes

Have you ever wondered why your “I am” affirmations aren’t getting you anywhere? Why you’ve been trying so hard to change how you speak about yourself, but your default mindset is still awful? Have

you ever wondered why your brain just loves telling you how awful you are, even when you desperately don’t want it to? Read on if you’d like to start seeing some changes from the effort you’re putting into your “I am” affirmations.


Let’s face it. We’ve all been there. There’s absolutely no denying it.

We’ve judged and criticised ourselves for many, many years and we have put ourselves down and belittled and ridiculed ourselves to such an extent that we even hate ourselves. We are actually our own worst enemies!

I really want you to think about this. Think about it deeply!

If your best friend spoke to you, the way you speak to yourself during your bad days, during your toughest moments, while traversing through insurmounatable mountains of challenges, would you keep them as your best friend?

Or would you gently let that toxicity walk out the front door of your life, and lock that door behind it?

From this point forward, I want you to start recognising how often you talk negatively about yourself? How often exactly do you put yourself down?


You know how they say that if you actually sight a single flea on your dog or cat, there are hundreds more hiding in the coat hiding in plain sight? You know they’re there, but you just can’t see them!

And you know that for every flea you see, there are thousands of eggs hiding too. You are well aware that the eggs are so small that you can’t see them, but you just know that they’re setting the scene for what’s to come?

Getting rid of fleas can be extremely difficult. You can treat your dog or cat, but the eggs remain in the yard or in the carpet of your house, and as the conditions ripen into what the eggs need, they hatch, and the flea cycle is started all over again.

The flea cycle can be severed, with a combination of treating your pet, and fumigating the environment, which is fantastic if every little variable can be treated.

More challenging if (as in my home in Australia) we have kangaroos coming into my paddocks or front lawn to eat the grass, or possums living in the tree right next to the house who will then pass fleas back to my pets and the cycle begins again.

Or I will take my dog for a drive to the local park or cafe, and she may pick a flea up from there and bring it home.


Just like fleas, we need to fumigate the toxicity! Work on our minds to remove the toxic thoughts that we produce on our own and just like our pets with fleas, we can be subjected to toxic thoughts andother people’s opinions and negativity on a regular basis, whether we want to be or not, so we need to start becoming aware of our environment.

When we start affirmations, it is easy to get caught up in the ideal that because we are saying these nice things to ourselves a hundred times a day, that all of a sudden we are healed.

We need to remember though that, like the one flea we can see, our affirmation is changing only one core belief we have of ourselves which is the equivalent of the sighted flea, and we need to continue saying the affirmation over and over and over and over…….


Your affirmations need to be so repetitive that it has not only changed the core belief at the conscious level, but also positively affected the subconscious level, ie fumigated the environment as well as put up environmental protection, which is the equivalent of treating all the flea eggs that we can’t see.

These ‘unhatched’ thoughts, given the right environment, would have hatched as another round of negative and toxic self talk, which you would then have to attack each flea separately again.

Examples of triggers for the ‘eggs’ to hatch are an inappropriate comment by a friend or family member, a triggering remark on a tv show, something you witnessed at the supermarket, or an incident of road rage etc

We can’t always control our environment and the triggers we get so we need to safeguard ourselves to the best of our ability!



“I Am” statements are incredibly powerful, but whilst they are used to improve how we view ourselves and must be a little out of our comfort zone to make headway, they must also be s

omewhat believeable.

Telling yourself “I am a millionaire” when you have no food in t

he fridge, and $0.17 cents in your bank account is going to trigger bigger, heavier toxic emotions and self talk than you are overcoming.

Choosing your affirmation is crucially important! In this case, perhaps “I am choosing to cultivate an abundant mindset” or “I am choosing to love money” would be an appropriate option. Find something that resonates, that excites you to say it, whilst at the same time pushing your comfort zone.

And repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat… until you are sick to death of that affirmation.

Then repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat some more.


Affirm to yourself in the shower, when you wake up in the morning, while you’re watching tv, while you’re driving your car, or sitting on the train. Repeat as a mantra as you’re falling asleep, say it as you’re going for a walk, use it repetitively during a meditation. Use it like clockwork.

Teach yourself when you are triggered, to immediately find your positive “I am” statement and turn that toxic thought around as quickly as it happens.

Once you have mastered the art of using your “I Am”s in place of the negative when you are triggered, you are well on the way to changing your subconscious programming where you will start to see physical changes happening in your life.



When you realise how many times you have told yourself the toxic negative thoughts, you will understand why it takes so many repetitions to make a difference when we try to change our thinking, but when we work on one affirmation at a time, one day at a time, rather than many, we truly have the power to edit our programming to a more empowered script.

Let me know, by commenting below, what “I am” affirmation you are working on at the moment, and what changes you are trying to achieve in your life at the moment.

Josie x

10 thoughts on ““I Am” Affirmations – Understanding Toxic Thought Processes

  1. Hi Josie, I really liked your image about negative thoughts coming back like fleas and needing fumigation. This is a very powerful metaphor. 

    However, I was hoping to find more practical examples on how to “fumigate” my “fleas”… In my case, every morning I do a routine ritual, which is mostly physical exercise (the 5 Tibetan rites) followed by a gratefulness exercise, and concluding with affirmations. Unfortunately, I find my affirmations to be more and more bland, and I think I need to challenge myself, but maybe I’m just lacking imagination on how to do it. Any suggestions? Thank you very much, Phil

    1. You have an incredibly powerful morning routine, huge kudos to you! In regards to your affirmations being bland, I actually think you are probably on the right path. Affirmations don’t need to be big and colourful. They just need to gently push you outside your comfort zone of beliefs and thought forms so that you can improve your perception. The fact that they get bland means that you have affirmed them so much that you are beginning to believe them; and that’s exactly where we need to be! At that point, keep working on the same affirmations to truly concretise them into your default thinking.

      Obviously at some point you will need to change them to something different, but I’m not one for ‘going big and fancy’ with my affirmations. If you make them too colourful and long, you will trip over your words, and you lose the impact of the affirmation, so don’t be afraid to keep your wording boring, but choose to affirm something that excites you – something you aspire to be like, and work on that affirmation.

      I hope this helps!

      Love and Blessings,

      Josie x

  2. Very powerful article, thanks for sharing. I love being empowered through others experiences and it is very important to have self worth to improve your life and yourself as a person. I personally do not dwell on negatives and I think more people should do the same. Instead, focus on the good in life no matter how little it may be, your attitude will attract others similar to yourself and this is a fact. Negativity will just provoke others to do the same so when you’re positive while others are negative, you will stand out and you might even encourage someone to have a better day even just by saying hello or complementing them in some way. Of course this all starts with yourself, so make sure you love yourself first!

    1. Thanks for your lovely comment, Paul! You are so right- focus on the good in life, even though it might be little, and you will attract more good. A change of perception is not only brilliant for your own wellbeing, but has such an incredibly powerful influence on the people around you! And as you say, self love is absolutely key!

      Love and Blessings,
      Josie x

  3. This is such a great article!  I am a firm believer in the positive affirmations you speak about.  I am also a Christian, and in my church I’ve learned that it’s actually an insult to God to put ourselves down.  It’s not right because God made us beautiful in his eyes and in his likeness.  I understand none of us are perfect, and I believe we all need to strive to improve in our areas of weakness, but to put ourselves down is just not what God wants.  I know when I say positive affirmations to myself, and I smile (that really helps a lot), my entire being feels completely different inside.  It’s rather astounding.  I hope many people will read this article.

    1. Wow, Babsie, that’s actually really interesting to hear that your church considers it an insult to God to put ourselves down. It actually makes total sense to me, even though I’ve not necessarily heard that before – my beliefs are that our souls are God/ the universe expressing himself/ itself as a physical manifestation. So with that in mind, of course God doesn’t want us putting ourselves down! You have a great point about saying the affirmations with a smile too – a smile has a huge affect on our feel good hormones, and as such is an incredible amplifier for our affirmations.

      Love and Blessings,
      Josie x

  4. Thank you so much to the author who has written down such a beneficial kind of article. This article opened my mind to the fact that there are processes in understanding toxic thoughts. I have always thought negatively about myself because of the bad experiences I am having recently but I have always been optimistic on the other hand hoping everything would surely work out fine. Thanks for the eye opener on this topic. This is highly and well appreciated

    1. Sorry to hear you have been having a tough time recently, Tracey. I’m glad this post has helped you and I hope that you might be able to continue working on those thought processes and in time develop more self belief and self worth – because you are worthy, and you are beautiful!

      Love and Blessings,
      Josie x

  5. Hello,

    Thank you so much for this post, it helped me so much and I can assure it will help more people. I usually try to tell myself motivating and positive things, but when I’m feeling down they don’t work and I end up thinking bad and sad things.

    I try to tell myself that I am valid, that I am doing okay, that I am capable of confronting the struggles I will face in life, that I am following the correct path to reach my goals.

    I will follow your advice and I hope I can change my mind-set.



    1. Hi Mariana,

      I’m so glad you found value in this post. I’m really sorry to hear you feel like you’ve hit a road block with your mindset. Our thoughts are an absolute minefield of challenges, so be gentle on yourself, always remember that the subconscious has spent a lot of time affirming the negative so you’ve got a lot of years of programming to change.

      Keep up the good work, the more you do, the more things will change!

      Love and Blessings,

      Josie x

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