Self Pleasure For Women As A Tool For Self Development

Self pleasure for women has long been treated as a taboo subject. It’s always been ok for men to masturbate, but women have long been held under the stereotypy that it is wrong, and hence we have grown into a society full of repressed, wounded and insecure women who often feel that they shouldn’t be proud of their own sexuality.

But what if we could change that? What if we could embrace our amazing sexuality, using yoni eggs as a tool to step into our authenticity and connect with our inner selves at an intimate level as a tool for self development.


Sex. It sells. We all know this. We should be sexy. Look sexy. Speak sexy. Dress sexy. Act sexy. All the time.

We are surrounded by gorgeous women on the cover of magazines everywhere we go. On billboards. Tv. Movies. Even ‘regular’ women in ads. They’re all gorgeous! Thin. Tanned. Toned. Photoshopped to a level of deliciousness that we strive to be like, wish we could be like, every moment of our day.

And yet, most of those stunning women would be unrecognisable if we saw them in person. With their legs and arms and belly the real size that they are, rather than halved to meet the standards of a magazine. With actual skin blemishes like all women have. With actual wrinkles like all women have.

But we know this. We know that none of it is real. There have been enough articles by now, showing us how photoshop works. Discussing the unrealistic nature of these high standards of sexiness in the reality of the normal woman. But the damage has been done. We are still judged by so many men on these appearances and what has come to be expected in a magazine.

We are being judged every day on whether we are similar to an unrecognisable version of a person that we wouldn’t even be able to recognise! It is ingrained in us now that we should be like that. So sexy. In looks, actions, being, speaking. In every way.

And because we can’t become the impossibility of these beautiful women that are photoshopped to these levels of perceived perfections, we have then become completely and utterly disconnected to our sexuality, wounding our divine feminine essence to even greater levels.


To add to this, every woman in the world has had some sort of trauma; emotional or otherwise (and there are many, many levels of trauma), that has created a negative impact on our sexual health by way of our emotions.

Emotions are the big catalysts that make or break our world. They are the major core of the human existence. They are impossible not to have. Negative, positive, neutral, positive that is perceived as negative, negative that is perceived as positive. But all emotions nonetheless.

And we store our issues in our tissues.

What I mean with this can be compared to when we get a bit stressed, and upset. We might feel so upset that our tummy starts doing somersaults, and our muscles tense up, especially in our shoulders and neck and that flows to our head and we get a headache.


The extension of this is that at the core of our being we are feminine, and sexual creatures. Our femininity and sexuality stems from our sexual organs. Our yonis. Yoni is the Sanskrit word for ‘sacred tunnel’. And, we store our issues in our tissues.


From the basic little bit of frustration from having a disagreement with a work colleague, to our friend being upset because we were late to lunch, or a disconnection in the bedroom with our partner, to more sinister issues like sexual trauma from being sexually abused.

The end result is that we store our issues in our yoni tissues.

All of that lack of self worth. All that says we don’t deserve a wonderful relationship in our life. All that holds us in disrespect of ourselves. All that disconnection with others. And worst of all, all the disconnection we created within ourselves, and to ourselves.


Our yoni tissues respond the same as our head during a phase of stress. By tensing and tightening over time of prolonged tension and stress, we create pain by way of a headache. And we do the same in our yonis with prolonged tension and stress, creating pain.

This is why eventually, sexual interactions for women can become very unpleasurable! With a lack of sensitivity in the yoni, and/or pain, especially during intercourse, many women struggle with self pleasure, as well as allowing themselves to feel pleasure when with their partners.

This is why women then shut off from self pleasure, their own sexuality, and of course their partners because they feel little to no libido.

This is why women stop instigating a sexual connection and sexually intimate moments with their partners. It all gets too challenging and uncomfortable.



And sadly, most women have never been taught how to process their emotions, and even fewer women have been taught how to release the tension and pain in their yonis to reconnect with that part of their body, their emotions, their core self.

Most women are just floating around doing what they need to do with no sense of connection to themselves. And then they wonder why their relationships are falling apart.

If you can’t connect with yourself, how can you expect to connect with a partner?


This is what yoni eggs are for. Yoni eggs are about creating a learning process to reconnect with self and find our self love.

They are about taking a conscious moment with self, as regularly as possible, to say “hey me, I’m here, and I still love, honour and respect myself”.

It is about learning how to love yourself at a core level, releasing all of those traumas from our yoni tissues, releasing the emotions, the tension and pain to be able to reconnect.

Just because it has been challenging and painful recently, doesn’t mean it will always be like that. There are tools to help you!


Using crystal yoni eggs consciously we can find our sensual, sexual self. Our self that knows it’s inherently valuable. Inherently respectable. Inherently worthy. Inherently loveable.

There are many practices that women can do with their yoni eggs to help overcome any emotional and physical trauma that they are holding onto in their minds and bodies.

Yoni eggs are a really ancient and sacred tool to create a more loving, intimate and empowered relationship with the self, and with your partner and when used with the right intention you will feel the benefits almost immediately.

I will do another post in the near future to delve into yoni eggs a bit more; their history, how to look after them, and a few beginner exercises to using them for women to improve their self pleasure and loving connection with their inner self.

My favourite supplier of empowered pleasure tools for women, including yoni eggs, is the beautiful Rosie Rees who has a worldwide following and incredible support for her customers on Facebook where you can ask as many questions as you have in a super safe and non judgemental environment.

Love and Blessings,

Josie x


24 thoughts on “Self Pleasure For Women As A Tool For Self Development

  1. This article is exceptionally rich in information, this is an exhaustive and helpful article indeed! I must commend you for taking your time to experience every action to revealing these secrets. You have said it all and I must tell you this article is a top notch and also a must for every lady to read. Thanks for sharing this lovely tips

  2. Unhealthy advertisement is enriching the manufacturing companies of those products and at the same time giving out serious injury to some women who can’t live up or catch up with the standards set by these companies by the reason of the advertisements. Many women have resorted to some unhealthy attitude which in the long run will be at the detriment of their lives 

    1. You’re so right Sammy. And I must add that it’s no longer an issue restricted to women – men are now represented in an unrealistic light quite often nowadays too. Healthy masculinity has taken some big hits with all the feminism issues that have been brought forth in recent years. It’s a process to rebalance things so that neither sex is shamed for not presenting in a way that the photoshopped advertising has us believe we should.

      Love and Blessings,

      Josie x

  3. What an emotional article on self pleasure for women as a tool for self development. I agree completely with this article that women are being stereotyped in self gratification. It’s true that if a woman doesn’t know herself sexually and emotionally, it will be difficult for her to perform in bed better with her partner. I think the use of yoni eggs for learning and knowing oneself is really cool for women out there. I have learnt alot from this article. Great job.

  4. It all begins and ends with loving yourself. Trauma can do alot of damage to a woman’s self love or esteem, and that’s where the downward spiral begins. 

    To stay afloat and refuse to drown in the pool of traumatic experiences that can cause a loss of sexual appetite, a woman must identify fully with who she is and that’s where Yoni eggs come in. Keeping in touch with yourself and letting her know that you are always there, through thick and thin, even when every one else is gone. 

    1. Thanks Peace – it sounds like you’re already a lover of yoni eggs. I love that you have identified so well with the content.

      Josie x

  5. Thank you so much for this wonderful article. I am a strong fan of freedom of expression and I believe it is important that women should be given the freedom and also allowed to connect deeply with their inner being. Yoni eggs will just be a perfect kit for women generally be it those going through stress or those who need a relaxing medium.
    Thank you very much for this post.

    1. Thank you David for your comment! It’s awesome to see the growing community of men who understand the importance of women healing their sexual traumas and working to improve how they connect to themselves within.

      Love and Blessings,

      Josie x

  6. Thanks for writing this article on self pleasure for women as a tool for self development, you really did well in writing this post, I find each and every part of this article informative on things I didn’t even know before; about women’s emotions and pleasure. Although this is my first time hearing about Yoni eggs, in coming days I wish to know more and more about it

    1. Thanks for your reply! I’m so glad you gained something from my post, and I hope my coming posts will continue building on your knowledge and understanding.

      Josie x

  7. Thanks for sharing this wonderful article here with us, I appreciate you taking time and breaking it all down for us. This us great. I found this article informative and educative. I would share this with my friends and family. Again, thanks for building this website and investing time. It’s a great site.

    1. Thank you for your comment Musbau, and thank you so much for sharing with the important people in your life. It means a lot to me!

      Josie x

  8. This is incredible, I’ve never read or heard about yoni egg before, but reading through was amazing to me. Please I’ll like to know if this can work for a lady with poor response to sexual activities, or let me say low libido. Perhaps ladies that are easily turned out during sex. I’ll like to know if this work for them.

    1. Hi Marshall, thank you so much for your questions! The answer is a resounding YES! Most often, women who are not in touch with themselves or their partners sexually have inner trauma and a lack of inner connection. By improving our sense of connection to self emotionally and then physically and sexually, it then allows us to connect better with our partners emotionally, and then physically and sexually.

      I hope this helps, and I welcome any further questions, here or in an email if you feel more comfortable emailing –

      Love and Blessings,

      Josie x

  9. What an empowering post and I agree us women should be more opened to pleasure ourselves. I do have a few tools but they are the conventional rubber material. I find the rabbit to satisfy me the most.  I went to the link and was wonder how does the egg work? I guess I am just going to wait for your next post and review on that. I would love to explore a healthier material for my yoni 🙂 Let us all feel pretty and sexy and embrace our sexuality without feeling shame. Thank you for writing such an uplifting post.

    1. I wish I could give you those answers right here and now, but it requires at least another full blog post, if not a few more to cover those things properly. Keep your eyes peeled for more to come! What I will say is that the rabbit can desensitise us, reducing our pleasure long term, so that is something to be aware of. The egg works, partially by the healing powers of the crystal you are using, as well as the intent behind the use – using it in the ways I will outline in a new post soon, you will find yourself getting juicier and building sensitivities rather than suppressing. I look forward to helping you with these answers soon – thank you so much for your comment!

      Love and Blessings,

      Josie x

  10. Self pleasure for women shouldn’t be underrated or trampled on. Women deserves self pleasure too and not only men. When a man misbehaves sexually or masturbates, the society takes it as a normal thing but the reverse is the case with a woman.
    Some women have been depressed out of no sexual cares from their spouse because their spouse feels that women don’t need to know the real taste of sexual satisfaction.

    1. You are so very right! Luckily for us women, sexual repression is becoming less and less as the spiritual community recognises conscious, healthy sexuality and we can slowly learn tools that help us to let go of our old limiting beliefs.

      Josie x

  11. Hi Josie,

    As a woman I have found that many cultures have the habit of suppressing women and each woman has to make a decision to find things that give you pleasure and personal pleasure and satisfaction. As a christian, I find a lot of pleasure in christian music and I like to sing very loud. 

    I have never heard of Yoni eggs but you seem to have made a case for it with your post. I see you have another post about the importance of prayers for healing the mind and heart. That is something I agree with.

    Best regards

    1. Being a Christian, I understand this post could’ve potentially gone against your beliefs! I appreciate your comment and I hope that this has given you a different parameter to explore intellectually.

      Josie x

  12. Good afternoon Josie,

    On the About Josie page, I read your life story. I am really happy for you that you made it, I understand it was not easy.

    Your post made me look back at my life. I realize I have been lucky in my nearly 69 years to not have suffered anything you mention. I think your post will be helpful for women who suffer any sexual trauma.

    Regards, Taetske

    1. Thank you for your comment, Taetske. It’s lovely to hear that you haven’t suffered! We all have challenges in some areas of life, and it’s miraculous to hear you got through this area unscathed. Beautiful!

      Josie x

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